It's normal to be afraid of losing loved ones. However, it is different from people with thantophobia. This phobia makes the sufferer very afraid of losing loved ones to the point that it interferes with the quality of life and relationships with other people.
Thantophobia is an excessive fear of losing a loved one, be it a spouse, family or friends. This term is often confused with thanatophobia because of the similarity in name. Actually, both describe different conditions, yes.
Some people with thantophobia feel afraid of losing loved ones to the point of becoming overprotective. However, there are also sufferers who are so afraid of losing that they don't dare to express their love and choose not to have a special relationship with the people they love. That way, he hoped he wouldn't feel like he was missing anything.
Thantophobia Causes and Symptoms
There is no definite reason why thantophobia can occur. However, having a crisis of faith and trauma in childhood, such as abuse, the death of a loved one, or a parent's divorce, can increase a person's risk of experiencing thantophobia.
Age factors and economic problems are also often associated with thantophobia. In addition, people who suffer from anxiety disorders, PTSD, depression, and other mental illnesses can experience excessive fear of being left by loved ones.
The fear felt by people with thantophobia can be expressed in many forms, such as sadness, anger, or denial. These feelings may be accompanied by physical symptoms, such as shortness of breath, shaking, chest pain, dizziness, headache, and sweating.
People with thantophobia may also have the following behaviors:
- Restricting their partner from hanging out with friends, especially the opposite sex
- Checks the phone and its partner's location at any time
- Get angry when their partner doesn't pick up the phone or return text messages
- Feeling jealous of friends and even his partner's family
- Feeling that their partner can only be safe with them
- Makes decisions in anything that concerns his partner
- Leading the opinion of his partner to hate something
- This is How to Overcome Thantophobia
People with thantophobia can be trapped in toxic relationships and are at risk of developing mental illness if this phobia is not treated.
Apart from that, it is undeniable that people with thantophobia can also feel deep regret for being overprotective. If he chooses love in silence, he might regret that he never expressed his love for his idol.
If you are a thantophobe and are trying to get out of this phobia, let's apply the following methods:
1. Learn the right way to love someone
You don't have to be overprotective to keep the people you love with you. All you need to do is accept all of his strengths and weaknesses, respect his freedom while it is positive, and listen to his opinion.
By understanding how to love someone exactly, you can focus more on the quality of their relationship instead of looking for ways not to lose them. If the relationship you build is healthy, he's not going anywhere.
2. Understand the importance of trust in relationships
Trust is one of the foundations in a relationship. Relationships that are not based on trust actually make you always think negatively, including the thought that He will leave you. Well, try to learn to build trust in relationships.
This can be started by always telling the truth, not selling promises, and forgiving each other.
3. Ask for opinions from others
There's nothing wrong with talking to people you trust to get another perspective. Ask how they think of the way you treat your loved ones. You can also consult a psychologist or psychiatrist to help you understand and manage your thoughts and feelings.
4. Undergo therapy
If needed, a psychologist or psychiatrist may recommend that you undergo cognitive behavioral therapy. This therapy aims to change negative thought patterns and responses when you are faced with something that makes you feel excessively afraid and anxious.
In addition, the doctor may prescribe drugs to treat excessive fear and anxiety. You will also be encouraged to change your lifestyle to be healthier so that your mental and physical health is always maintained.
Fear of losing loved ones is normal. However, remember, everyone who comes will surely go, whether it is still in the world or not. So, do good things with those you love so that they become beautiful memories to remember.